Review: No Flirting In The Bunker Please (Hen and Chickens Theatre)

Review by Dan Sinclair

⭐️⭐️⭐️

Denzel and Lily are two of the sixteen babies kept deep underground by the government, a repository for the end of humanity. The great event raged on above, perhaps a war, maybe a disaster, but all they know is the eight rooms of the bunker and that they have a massive stinking crush on each other. No Flirting In The Bunker Please is a brand-new musical in development from Kat Kleve and Joe Venable, a composing duo who have both had respective success with their independent projects (2024’s TINK and Rishi Sunak’s Doing A Musical, respectively). They bring this workshop to the Hen and Chickens for their new show, one still in development. Touching and intimate, No Flirting In The Bunker looks at underage pregnancy and freedom under the harshest of conditions, under a so-called utopia.

Growing up together, Denzel (Benjamin Bortone Page) and Lily (Becca Carmichael) have forever hung off each other, the best of friends, but now they’re 16, everything’s starting to change. Forbidden from coupling up, they have to sneak longing glances wherever they can. But when the two find a loophole, if they have a baby together, then they will be allowed to stay together, and the story kicks off. It’s a pared back performance, Page and Carmichael are understated in their performances, whilst I did sometimes want a bit more OOMPH (the technical term), it was fine for the scale of the show.

This is a confident and skilled workshop musical, all built around the piano; it is a fantastic showcase of the composition skills of Kleve and Venable. Upon reading the letters from their mothers, ‘Don’t Let Me Down’, a magical duet smacks you in the face with the heart at the core of this show. The music is packed with soul and is without pretence; this song particularly gave me genuine shivers down my neck. This also has to be put to the vocal talents of Carmichael and Page; their vocal performances are gentle and perfectly matched to the intimacy of the Hen and Chickens (and bunker, I suppose).

For me, it did feel at times like the book and story came second to the beautiful songs, with music by Kat Kleve and lyrics from Joe Venable. Much of the dialogue was performed monologue style, straight out at the audience, simply recounting the events. And whilst this was sometimes framed as being a tape for ‘baby’, this was not always the case and left moments feeling a bit like listening to the wikipedia outline of the show. When the two performers, Benjamin Bortone Page as Denzel and Becca Carmichael, did act off each other in a scene, it came alive. I just wish this were the standard. 

Shows set in a bunker during the end of the world are, somehow, almost a whole genre unto themselves at the moment. I’ve seen a surprising amount across pub theatres, and I’m sure if you have a look at the What’s On pages, there are at least two other shows set in a bunker taking place right now. Does this make me a wee bit biased against them? Honestly, yes, but when they work, they really work. Ironically, I just don’t think that No Flirting In The Bunker needs to be a bunker show; it never quite made full use of this premise. The end of the world, the rationing and the bigger questions that emerge weren’t fully utilised, and the show's focus instead on love and underage pregnancy means the show could just as easily be picked up and set in an Amish barn, a halfway house, a prison, a boarding school and very little at all would have to be changed. 

Joe Venable’s book was full of charm and witty little nods, with dialogue being baked with slang and childish quips, very reminiscent of the nadsat slang from A Clockwork Orange. Denzel felt ‘heart squashed’, he was getting along ‘quite nicefully’, and a whole other host of invented terms from the bunker. These little details show real craft and commitment to the characters and world of the play. Directed with care by Jennifer Lane Baker, it was paced just right and made great use of the piano as the centrepiece. For a workshop-style performance in a quick turnaround, it was remarkably well staged.

Actor-musician shows have been having a quiet time in the industry currently, but with the talents of Baker and Venable, it is clear that this won’t be for long. In its early stage, the actual bunker is the weakest part of No Flirting In The Bunker, but with a stacked set of songs and whip smart lyricism, it’s a show that packs promise and with a bit of tweaking, I’m sure it will soon soar like a butterfly.

No Flirting In The Bunker played at the Hen and Chickens Theatre from the 4th - 6th December. For updates on the future of the show follow them here:

TikTok: @noflirtinginthebunker

Instagram: @noflirtinginthebunkerplease

Photos by Sylvie Tamar